Monday, July 28, 2008

Bathtime fun again...

Chloe has been talking more and more about missing Christa lately. Don't know if she's missing her more now or if she's picking up that vibe from me. I've been thinking about Christa a lot lately. It's nice to be able to chat with Chloe about her. It feels like she's still part of our lives that way. So many things remind us of her. Today Chloe chose to watch Winnie the Pooh because she said it was Christa's favourite, and maybe Christa might watch it with her from heaven:)

Chloe hadn't really had a 'friend' to enjoy her baths with for quite a while. Bath times seemed quieter and quicker without Christa. They used to enjoy playing in the bath and had lots of fun together. Chloe said the other day, " I wish Rachel can be 1 or 2 or 3 soon. Then I can have someone to play with again." I'm glad that she doesn't have to wait that long. It seems like even just having Rachel in the bath with her made her feel 'happier' and more keen on bath time. Rachel's also quite enjoying bath time with her sister.

So many bath time memories... I will always remember the time we were in Sedgefield and Chloe and Christa were in the bath together playing. We were watching TV in the lounge and we just kept hearing laughter coming from the bathroom. I went to see what was going on and what they kept laughing about. I found out that Chloe had put a cup on her head, sneezed and made the cup fall off her head. And everything the cup fell, Christa would laugh. And this went on and on for ages....

Friday, July 18, 2008

Glimpses of Christa

Took a recent of photo of Rachel when she was wearing this suit. It reminded me of Christa's picture from her first school. She was probably about 9/10 months old then. I often see glimpses of Christa in little Rachel. But she is growing to be her own person. Wish Christa could have been here to be a big sister to Rachel. She really would have loved being the older the sister for a change. Chloe's been terrific with Rachel though, she has been making her laugh like no one else can. It brought to memory the time in ICU when Christa woke up from sedation after nearly 6 weeks being out of it, and the person that made her laugh was her sister. Oh what a special bond it is between sisters....

Saturday, July 12, 2008

Little Treasures

Went for our friends Rodney and Jo's annual get-together. It was a delectable desserts evening...mmm:) But more than that I was surprised by a 'treasure' given to me by Jo as we were leaving...a picture of Christa and me at the same get-together last year! What a treasure:) And for me it just reminded me again of God's care for me and how He knows that we need reminders of our loved ones every now and then. I know there were days when I wanted to find something of Christa's so badly and it's nice to be able to go to her memory box and find things that remind me of her. But it's extra special when you're not particularly looking for it and it just gets handed to you-now I know that someone up there is watching over me. Thank you Lord!


I was reminded of this song from the children's camp we did during my YWAM mission trip:

"The Lord loves me and all His wonders I see

The rainbow shines through my window

The Lord loves me..."

Wednesday, July 9, 2008

Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow....

Seems like it's been snowing again in Ceres. We were there with Christa on the 28th of July last year, about a month and a half before Christa took ill. We listened to our favorite snow song "Let it Snow."

The weather outside is frightful,
But the fire is so delightful
And since we have no place to go
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow.....(and so it goes on....)

Christa and Chloe would make their little comments....popcorn? fire? at the appropriate places with a big yay and clap at the end.The song was playing over and over again in the car, driving Carl crazy! That was Christa's first and last time in the snow. It's snowing again out that way now and I think of my beloved little Christa and miss her desperately. Don't know if we will brave venturing out there again this year. Somehow in my heart it doesn't feel right without her. But maybe if others are going, it might change my mind. I think the two things I'm finding the hardest right now is contemplating whether or not to go to the snow this year if someone decides to go and Chloe's upcoming birthday. That was the last birthday I planned and Christa's last proper birthday that she got to enjoy. It was unfortunate that it wasn't hers. She was in hospital for her birthday. Praying that God will help heal my heart one day at a time.


Saturday, July 5, 2008

Scrapbooking Christa's Memories

Have been trying to put together a book of Christa's memories...like Piglet's book of memories in Piglet's Big Movie. Going through the pictures really brought back memories of all the happiness she brought into our lives. I begun with the picture of her ultrasound scans. She must have only been about 3 months then but you could see her form so perfectly. It truly is a miracle. I could think of no better words than the verses from Psalm 139:13-16:


For You created my inmost being;
You knit me together in my mother's womb
I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
Your works are wonderful, I know that full well.
My frame was not hidden from You
When I was made in the secret place.
When I was woven together in the depths of the earth,
Your eyes saw my unformed body.
All the days ordained for me (1240 days in all)
were written in your book before one of them came to be....